My RI Life, The All Caps Edition With Alfred Dente

In this My RI Life, meet the self-described 'Patron Saint Of Facebook', who famously lives his life in all caps, ran for President and Governor, swears by Goya wine (his latest go-to drink of choice), and has zero patience for anyone he deems a 'slug rake'. And he follows PattyJ.com. It's our most unexpected post yet. 

HELLO MY NAME IS ALFRED DENTE AND I LOVE RHODE ISLAND!!!!! I RAN FOR GOVERNER IN 2014 AND I AM A JANITER SO I NO HOW TO CLEAN UP A MESS I DID NOT MAKE!!!!! AND THATS WHAT I WAS GOING TO DO FOR RHODE ISLAND- AND I WAS GOING TO FILL EVERY POT HOLE MY SELF AND DO IT ALL FOR TEN DOLARS A HOUR!!!!! WE HAVE A REALY BYOUTIFULL STATE BUT WE HAVE BEEN RUN BY UGLY SLUG RAKE POLITISHINS FOR AS LONG AS I HAVE BEEN A LIVE WITCH IS SINCE 1963 AND IT HAS PROBLY GONE ON BE FOR THAT!!!! PROBLY SINSE ROBIN WILLIAMS FOWNDED THIS STATE ITS BEEN CORUPT LOL!! ANY WAYS JUST THIS MORNING I WAS GOING TO WORK AND I WAS AT A RED LITE ON ROOT 2 BY THE WENDYS WEAR THE SEAGALS SWARM ABOVE AND THE MALL THATS BEEN EMPTY FOR THE LAST TEN YEARS AND ANY WAYS THIS PAN HANDLER STICKS HIS HEAD IN MY CHRYSLER 300 M SPORT EDISHIN!!!! HE STICKS HIS FACE RITE IN MINE AND HIS BRETH STANK LIKE A ASH TRAY FROM THE DUMPSTER AND AS SOON AS THE LITE CHANGED I FLOORED IT!!!!! I HERD A THUD AND WHEN I LOOKED BACK IN MY REAR VEW MEAROR AND I SAW HIM JUMPING UP AND DOWN HOLDING HIS FOOT!!!!! LOL I LOVE RHODE ISLAND!!!!!

Let's Get Social

In addition to his just shy of 5K Facebook Friends, Al Dente also has a line of t-shirts and stickers, featuring his signature (and controversial) catch phrases, from which he donates all the profits to local animal shelters. For the official Al Dente Store, click here.

***Views expressed in this #MyRILife are those of Alfred Dente and do not reflect those of PattyJ.com or Patty J Style, LLC. ***

Photo Credits: All photos courtesy of Alfred Dente